Toddler Talk

Sir Toddler is starting to string together sentences. Combine that with narrating everything he sees from a 2-year-old's perspective, and we've got some gems.

(starting grace before dinner, after being scolded for goofing off during grace at lunch that day)

"Faver, Son, Howey Spiwit, Amen...dis is not funny."

Sometimes we get, "Faver, Son, Howey Spiwit, Amen. Good job."

Alfie Kohn would hate us.

(At a Mass being celebrated by my husband's recently ordained best friend)

Me: "Look, Fr. [Priest] is praying to Jesus."

ST: "Faver, Son, Howey Spiwit, Amen. Bess us Yord..." (proceeds to say a jumbled but hilarious grace)

(later during the consecration of the Precious Blood)

ST: "Faver [Priest] eat beer."

(Whenever his sister cries)

"[Lady Infant] just c[r]anky." or "[Lady Infant] just c[r]y."

(During a discussion of beverages)

ST: "Mama drink coffee."

Me: "That's right, mama drinks coffee. Does Daddy drink coffee?"

ST: "Daddy drink coffee."

Me: "Does [Sir Toddler] drink coffee?"

ST: "[Sir Toddler] drink milk."

Me: "Does [Lady Infant] drink coffee?"

ST: "[Lady Infant] EAT MILKIES!"

Right.